Vegetable Chopping Gifts

"I'm literally naked about to be hacked to bits and *you're* crying!?!"

Prize vegetables.

baby sweetcorn...

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

But is it organic?

Allotment

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

Don't mind us. We're just trying to eat more locally grown food.

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

'Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist.'

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

Advocado

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

"Steamed vegetables."

"Oh, mournful and terrible engine of horror and crime—of agony and of death, not asparagus again!"

The discovery of asparagus.

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

Our farmer brought fresh beans, tomatoes, corn and squash this week. Nice. You should have bought into the farm share. I've got my own farmer. Mine's cheap. Mine's cheaper. Thanks, mom. You can't take more zucchini?

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

"I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test."

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

"I can't make it out - on the packet it said radishes."

Better Not Squash.

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

'What are you eating now?'

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

'I'm thankful you didn't make turnips.'

Planting veggies