Vacationist Gifts

With summer vacation over, Mrs. Locke was having a tough time transitioning back into teaching.

"Now, you want to ask for directions ... "

'When the airport said they were booking us on a different flight, I thouoght we'd still be going to Albuquerque!'

"Welcome to the staff! The compensation is generous and they have good benefits. They're cutting out our paid Bahamas cruise though, because too many employees never came back."

Easter Island legs

Tourists

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

'I think you're getting the hang of it.'

Bad fake tan day.

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

Working Holiday

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

Fight or Flight

Hiding the electronics.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

'Well, we always go to the same place for our holidays, so yes, we kind of migrate too...'

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

Travelling

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

I took a vacation to forget everything and I forgot my luggage.