Vacation Style Guru Gifts

"Better lose the hat people are staring."

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

A women in a shoeshop.

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"T-shirt weather's coming. How ready are you?"

"Absolutely not!"

Keeping warm.

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

Mr Metrosexual.

'Do you like my little black number?'

At the suit makers

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

His and Her wardrobe's

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

"That shirt is so last year."

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

"Keep heart Rexy boy... even if we strike out, we'll look damn good doing it."

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...