Vacation Grumbler Pillows

"Perfect weather,wounderful food...and it all distracted me from spending the whole day at my computer terminal!"

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

The Cat's Alarm Clock

"Don't worry, boss, he ain't gonna be takin' his shoes off on an airplane no more."

Rodin's Irish Judge

Boring and unnecessary meetings

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

"We saw some inspired lunacy, then had some uninspired Italian."

"My computer still won't work. It must still hold a grudge from when I punched it in frustration."

Heathrow Protesters - This airport's rubbish!

"OK, now here comes the lava."

'Why does the phone always have to ring when I'm out of the bath?!'

Man - 'This coffee tastes like mud!' Woman - 'It was ground this morning.'

'Mum! Mum!... My egg's gone all runny!'

Le Bolshie Chef.

'To be perfectly honest, I hate my job: I'm not really a morning person...'

"The sooner they take you off vice patrols the better."

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

'No, I'm still standing in this stupid line looking at the back of somebody's stupid head.'

Sorry, this game is not available in your area

'I hate Mondays!'

"All done with winter, are we, dear?"

'We've figured out your problem. You're allergic to grapes.'

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"

"Teaching's a joy until the first bell. Then the whole day's ruined."

'Irritable bowl syndrome'

"Whoever invented the obituary page is a real jerk."

"Where's the snooze button on this thing?" "Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!"

"If you are angry at being kept on hold, press 1, if you are furious press 2, if you are apoplectic with rage ..."

Supermarket Self Service Checkout

'Since he retired, it's been all play and no work, but he's STILL a dull boy!'

Contact Sport Lens.

"Now I've done it. I burned the toast AND the flag."

Inside-of-Body-Experience