Upgrade Enthusiast Gifts

"I think that was one upgrade to many for Chris!"

After the upgrade, crashes were far less frequent and seldom fatal.

'I haven't committed to a man yet. I'm waiting 'til they come out with the new improved version.'

"You're in the wrong queue, sir. . . the 'Air-of-entitlement, upgrade-demands' counter, is over there."

"Wherever he is, I know he'll be upgraded."

"Any chance of an upgrade?"

The Before-You-Know It-It'll-Be-Obsolete Computer Company

"Sorry I'm late, but the computer urgently needed my assistance to upgrade to something about which I have no clue."

Before-You-Know-It-It'll-Be-Obsolete Communications.

Man throwing out his outdated TV set.

Man feeding his computer money.

'Do you think we can afford better toilets?'...

'The boss seems to think you have an unhealthy obsession with upgrading your computer. You're to check into rehab on Monday.'

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

"They've already had two upgrades while we've been standing in line."

The Robotics Department. It says here that these guys completely replace all the cells in their bodies every seven years! Wow! What a slow upgrade cycle! If we don't replace all our parts every six months we become obsolete! It makes you wonder why they're in charge! Yeah, like they expect us to remember thousands of gigabytes of data while they forget their passwords! (Published originally on April 19, 2006)

My new laptop is nicer than your new laptop. I'm not going to get into a competition about whose new laptop is nicer. The one I replaced is nicer than the one you replaced. Stop it.

Packaging Russian Dolls

'But I did study. I guess the software didn't install successfully.'

'I'm working because I've been upgraded. He never upgraded so he's out of work.'

Thank God It's Friday.

"Anyway, to make a long story short, I'm the guy who invented CliffsNotes."

'We've decided to upgrade your position with a new version 2.0 employee.'

"I can't stand this new hardware. It's much harder than the old hardware."

Rudy, am I correct that you and Armstrong each just upgraded your laptops? Yeah, so? And last month, if I'm not mistaken, you and Armstrong each upgraded your phones. Again, so? Don't you see what's happened to you and Armstrong? You've synchronized your cycles. What? Your upgrade cycles! They're in sync! What in the world are you talking about? What in the world indeed?!

I don't want to buy anything. I don't want to upgrade. Watch this! What are you doing? Looking at an ad for the new Mac laptop. My heart's not racing! What's wrong with me?! It is sleek.

"I'm super excited about this fabulous opportunity to improve!"

I can be upgraded, can you?

'Of course, I do have a very supportive wife.'

'Spending and consuming - that's my kind of patriotism.'

'I'm too busy installing updates to figure out any practical application for them.'

"Just saying, if you can't trust your software upgrades, what can you trust?"

"It's quite alright searching for the perfect phone. But remember there always will be upgrades."

"My computer tower is so big and old, I had to rent a forklift to remove it from my home."

'When we converted the pub into a house, we decided to keep some of the original features.'