Unproductive Thoughts Pillows

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Maximilian could see far away places,but he never told anyone.

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

"Gentleman I believe I've found a revolutionary new way for us to more productively waste our lives."

Targets.

"Give a man a job, and he'll work all day. Teach a man to delegate, and he'll take the rest of the day off."

I came in early to seize the day...but it seized me first.

Man being fed 'Get up and Go' on a drip.

"I've found if I squint my eyes and frown, it looks like I'm concentrating rather than sleeping.".

How to boost your work output...

'This spider's web proves that you've done no work today!'

'Actually, I haven't done any work for a month due to technical difficulties.'

"That must be the new 'sit-work' desk."

Look at me multitasking. I'm shooting the breeze, checking invoices and drinking coffee.

Department of Productivity: Caution - High Speed Revolving Door.

Bummer Time Streaming

"We've increased job satisfaction. Now let's focus on productivity."

"How many work in my department? On a good day probably about half."

'We're hoping to employ a workaholic for whom job-satisfaction is reward enough.'

Mathematics.

"Unsticky notes test #17 success!"

"You'd be more productive if this was plugged in."

'Turned out nice again.'

"At least TRY to look as busy as a bee!"

'Your supervisor says you have been giving 100 each week, but at the rate of 20 each day.'

"Will people ever say of me - he made his mark?"

'Some way we've got to get back the good old American know-how to make cheap crap.'

'Good morning, I am Mister Greenreaper independent consultant. The management has asked me to reorganize your department in oder to improve its productivity and its competivity.'

"And another thing, stop sending me e-mails."

"Wow, it's only eleven – that still leaves time for me to ruin tomorrow by staying up doing nothing on the Internet."

"I'm always suspicious of empty wastebaskets."