Unexpected Athlete Gifts

'He hates basketball! He hates basketball! He hates basketball!'

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

'Well, Eddy may look a bit rough, but he's good at heart - last week, he bought stocks from a company which produces cuddly puppy toys in pink ballet dresses!'

'As avid soccer player, Roy head-bumps his playing partner's ball in for a birdie.'

"I hope your cast is not itchy, Stacy. I had an itchy cast on my arm once and it itched ALL the time. It felt like crawling ants! Itchy, itchy, itchy..."

Gymnast's Commute

'You said you went to night classes to draw birds, and when I asked whether they had clothes on and you said they didn't - you know I didn't expect this!'

"No window, but on the plus side there's a gateway to another dimension behind the Lloveras print."

I'm leaving the band in order to pursue a solo career.

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

'All I've ever wanted to do is dance!'

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

'Really, this award has come as a great surprise...'

Bowled out.

Magician conjures up a crocodile and is chased by it

Javelin

'He doesn't like to catch anything - He just fishes for the exercise!'

Monk Parrot.

Sweet Old Lady with jogging shoes and running number.

'What do you mean there's no specific rule that forbids a center fielder from doing that?'

Street Football

Colin was determined not to go thirsty on the fun run,,,

'The trouble with facing reality is you never know from which direction it's coming from.'

'I love these computerized running shoes that do the running without you.'

Too small to play forward. Too slow to play guard.

Life is full of surprises.

"Pretty nasty slice."

I hope you're letting Teddy get outside this summer. Yes, mother. He needs time to run free and be a kid. I know. Bye, mom. Where, exactly, will I be running free? Allstar, Youthbuild Paramilitary Sports Camp. 8 a.m. sharp!

A skier who has hit a solitary tree

"The video of you giving that big bloke a piece of your mind has gone viral!"

"I dragged a man out of a burning building. Un"fortunately, it was a fireman...

'I tripped over one of those 'Caution Slippery Floor' signs.'

"The control group has taken control."

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