Unexpected Scientist Gifts

"The control group has taken control."

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

Reverse Ageing Laboratory

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

"I guess one of the bunnies was a boy after all!"

Genetic Fingerprinting.

Pavlov's Cat

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

'Well, Eddy may look a bit rough, but he's good at heart - last week, he bought stocks from a company which produces cuddly puppy toys in pink ballet dresses!'

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

Cloning Laboratory: 'I never thought I'd work here.'

'This cork idea of yours is great! How do you get it out?'

Carl Wilhelm Scheele: "There was a great display of ores and minerals...I could not write with a molybdenite pencil."

No other lab did as cutting edge research using lab rats as test subjects as McWit Lab.

Impartial Testing: "Eeny, meeny, money, moe..."

'I'm left brained and I needed some right brains.'

Great progress has been made in the science of genetic clowning.

"Now don't expect any miracles. I'm only a para-scientist."

'Kleinzweck has a theory that the strong nuclear force is actually tiny rolls of duct tape.'

"Please, George...not here!"

Early Scientific Fraud: Young Thomas Edison Tried to Pass off a Container Filled with Fireflies as an Incandescent Bulb.

'Ever since I had a disease named after me, people seem to keep their distance.'

Cambridge Dons Researching Gravity.

'Do you promise to brush up on such matters as the Large Hadron Collider?'

'I'm writing my dissertation on Latte Sizes.'

'Are you sure Anderson is working on the Human Genome Project?'

Agricultural Failures: Hydroponic Livestock.

Foot Massage

'Money doesn't have wings, feet or wings. My dad says that nevertheless, it disappears with the speed of light.'

'You said you went to night classes to draw birds, and when I asked whether they had clothes on and you said they didn't - you know I didn't expect this!'