Undead Golfer Gifts

'He lived and died for golf.'

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

His golfing career in a long tailspin, PGA pro Andy Pemrick spent his later years as the pro at Happy Time Mini-Putt.

"Swallow the ball and stick the club up your a**e."

"Your boss wants you in early for WHAT?"

"At least my putting has improved."

'Putter'.

For a $50 payoff, Dwayne would agree not to follow a foursome around all 18 holes.

"Hold on ! Hold on! When you said you'd played this game before at school...."

'I knew it! Come back here!'

"IV!"

Using Science In Fashion Design

"On the sixteenth hole? I can sympathize with you, but I can't let you go back and finish the round!"

Ghoul Keeper

"Somewhere we must have strayed off the course."

Neanderthal Golf.

When Paul finally emerges, his partner is gone, and he is left to finish the round with a cooler of beer all to himself and no one to catch him cheating.

At first he thought he had died and gone to heaven.

The 19th hole

'You told me to address the ball, so I did!'

Golfing Accident

Golfer putting into whale's blowhole.

'You had enough power in our cell phone to make one last call, and instead of getting us rescued, you cancel your tee-time?'

Golfing Fakir.

'Gloria, tell my nine-o'clock to go to hell.'

"Slicey, Trappy, Bogey, Toppy, Mulligan, Hooky, Threeputty

How to tell you're playing a low budget golf course.

Observing a hydnoraceae on the 14th, Professor Brinley sportingly pitched rather than putted.

'A remote controlled golf ball! Yes, of course!'

Drawing of ancient golfer

Grim Reaper's caddy hands him the correct scythe from a golf bag of different scythes

Caveman's Clubs.