Undead Golfing Aficionado Gifts

Grim Reaper's caddy hands him the correct scythe from a golf bag of different scythes

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

Golfing Boss

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'We've re-branded.'

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

The Reaper's Arms

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."

Executive golf with Newton's cradle

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

"From this you make a living?"

'He lived and died for golf.'

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

"Sorry, we first have to do a background check."

"I see you've flown around the world in a plane, and settled revolutions in Spain. Around a golf course you're under par. Metro-Goldwyn has asked you to star. Very impressive, I must admit, but we're looking for someone with marketing experience."

Child buys 'Dracula doll': Keep in box until sunset.

Gopher underground hit by golf tee.

'Don't worry, the dog's a sales manager!'

'I suggest we wait at the pub until this bird realizes that it's hatching your golf ball.'

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

"Can I play with your ball, Mister, if you're not using it?"

"Eric, this is your father, mister Trump." "You must have the wrong number. I'm Mortimer Park."

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

'Sorry to leave you in the lurch but this trip is important'