Undead Aficionado Pillows

'My doctor's put me on a strict diet. From now on I have to ask my victims how high their cholesterol is.'

Child buys 'Dracula doll': Keep in box until sunset.

"It's such a beautiful day. Why don't we go out and get someone to eat?"

"Let's dig into that. When did you first start feeling like you lost the will to not live?"

Night of the just-trying-to-make-a-living dead.

"Ahh, those were the good old days."

'For once could we not have an evening with just the two of us rather than you always bringing along your drinking buddies.'

'Instead of one of our dishes you want to eat me? Just a minute, sir.. I've go to ask the manager.'

Nutrition classes for zombies.

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

Frankenstuff.

"Brrrr...! - You know when you get the feeling that someone's just fallen into your grave...?"

After-Life Mints

Zombies love ice fishing

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

'... And this is my cellar.'

Night of the Zombonies.

Paranormal A-Z...

Vlad the Inhaler

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

Devil's food cake/Angel's food cake. Delivery mix-up.

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

"I'll be a little late. I'm working a double shift."

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"I'm the bad guy..."

Astral Projection

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

'We've re-branded.'

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"