Typewriter Enthusiast Gifts

'This week's column is going to be about Writer's Block, and it's...'

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

'We don't know what the final result will look like, but the movie rights have already been optioned.'

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

Writer Crumples Up Typewriters Instead Of Drafts

"…the slender fox padded on silent feet across the pine needles, his moonshadow flickering across the tree trunks, while …. cocka-doodle-doo???!!!"

Lost Typewriter Key

COWS: Cow writers block

"I'm reverting to type."

"It was a dark and stormy night...."

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

"I'm not sheltering at home, I'm an artist in residence!"

A woman playing a keyboard

'I think we're closing in on the missing calligrapher.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

“The two spaces after a period were a dead giveaway.”

'Nice graphics.'

"Keep practicing, and someday you'll be able to play the two songs you remember at houses that also have pianos."

The Escape Key

Sales Secretary

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

Progression of human writing, from chisled stone to computers until 2000 when the computer has blown up

Writer breaks in new electric typewriter.

"I'm hooking up with this guy who makes the funniest typos."

'I told you. . . H not S!'

"Winter must be coming. The people in my novel are starting to wear mittens."

"He's our back-up if our computers fail."

The origins of bullet points.

A writer working on a typewriter is wearing a shirt with William Shakespeare's face on it.

Bob Dylan

"Pressing the escape key won't get you out of the boss' doghouse."

My Mom texted me to let me know she hates all the fonts she saw this week.

Organ transport team