Tweet Savvy Pillows

Trump Tweets

The Proust of Twitter

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

Bird Tweet.

Online Dating

"#BeCurious"

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

'I'll be a responsible and mature asset to the company, as proven by the lack of asinine photos of me on Facebook.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

Victorian Selfie

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

'The doctors say I have a rare illness that turns people into birds - it's untweetable.'

"If he has more than 20 followers on Twitter we call him a 'celebrity'."

"I already have the perfect hashtag!"

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"We do have on item the internet hasn't already beaten into the ground, ad nauseam."

Ornithologist

If Watergate Happened Now the Press Would Be Too Busy Reporting on Tweets

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

"I just tweeted a chirp."

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

'I don't understand your question. Could you restate it as an answer?'

"How'd I find you? I followed you on Twitter."

'It's a tweet from Maid Marian.'

"Jeremy and I are so in sync, we finish each other's tweets."

Man and bird

"We advised viewer discretion and they all decided not to watch."

"Wouldn't it have been easier just to tweet those?"

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

"I have the new list of approved tweets."

"Emojis fail me."

Pole vaulter uses his pole as a selfie stick while he gets ready to jump.

Yeah, I do the same thing – sniff their posts but never contribute. Dog lurkers.