Tv Talk Show Enthusiast Gifts

"The real question is whether health care is a basic human right or a bona-fide commercial opportunity."

"At the top of our news this evening, once again there were no clear winners on the Phil Donahue show today."

"Notice how they grow away from the incandescent-light source and towards the malicious celebrity gossip."

'Has Oprah ever been married?'

'I'm a male ladybug , , , is that a topic for a Jerry Springer show or what'

"So it was your father's influence that mad you decide to specialize in transplant surgery."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

Love is when you watch television together.

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."

"Open a wine that will make me want to watch the shows you want to watch."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

"I wanted a partner... I got a co-host."

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

"Remember that '70s TV show 'What's Happening'!? Did they ever come up with an answer?" "I don't know, but it makes me wonder if Marvin Gaye found out what's going on." "The black hole of cannabis-induced queries"

Day two of our series: America's sleeping pill addiction. My guest, pillhead Rudy Park. I'm not a pillhead. Come clean. Admit the obvious truth. What truth? Rush Limbaugh made you do it! A political pundit never misses an opportunity. You got hooked only after O'Reilly harassed you.

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

Will work for Food Network.

'What TV show do frog princes go on ...?...'

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

Time Machine Collision.

Night Life: L.A.

"You like it? We purchased the fourth wall from 'Westworld'."

"When did you first notice you were larger than life?"

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"