Talk Show Fan Gifts

The Freudian Slip Shop.

'He's a Jerry Springer Spaniel.'

Information / Way To Much Information

The Dr. Fairy Godmother Show: 'OK, if I were to fix that... And trust me, it ain't gonna happen... What long-term effect would that really have on your life?'

Life is better with a laugh track and graphics.

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

'Someone here wants to listen to you,Doris!'

'I should be on that.'

Graham Norton

Retired Talk Show Host.

"Well I think the Real question is..."

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

'Alan's claim to fame is that he was once a Jay Leno punch line.'

Rush Linbaugh - Radio Commentator.

'Man, I think I'm shooting blanks - I've been on the Morrie Show six times and I'm never the father.'

Lemming Hoax

'So you're not wanting a DNA test or a lie detector test??!!...What are you, some kind of freak or something!?..'

A new entry on the talk circuit - talk with Fido.

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out Joy Behar?'

'Whoever said, 'There are no stupid questions,' never listened to talk radio.'

Jeremy Kyle: 'I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus!'

'Get out the talk-show set, this guy's tough!'

Finding someone parked in her spot at the studio, Operah Winfrey will once again give a person in the audience a free car.

Men discussing a book on a chat show

Modern Scienstist

"Welcomes politician to the show."

Did you get through to the talk show? No, the call screener said I wasn't angry enough.

"Here's what I want to say, Tony: You, me, everybody in our industry can make a difference. There, I've said it."

"And I'm happy to be here, Johnny."

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

"I give it two thumbs up!" "You give everything two thumbs up!" The Iggy Iguanodon Show

Akron, OH, you're on Ask Sadie. What's your problem?! I'm thinking of not signing up for health insurance this year. Good idea. In my day, there was no such thing as health insurance. If you got sick, you paid for it with either money or chickens. That's if you were a lily-livered coward who just had to see a doctor. When great great grandmother Cohen had her sixth heart attack, she just applied a poultice made of chestnut leaves and flour and kept plowing.

Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Kenosha. What's your problem?! I'm a grad student pursuing my PhD. in robotics. Under the recent tax plan that passed the House, I'd have to count my tuition waiver as income, even though I never received any actual money. This would put me in a higher tax bracket and I'd have to drop out because I could never afford to pay those taxes. Good riddance, Poindexter. Science is nothing but gobbledygook anyway. Studies have shown that's not the case.