
"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."
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"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."
He's in training for the rugby World Cup.
Bowled over again!
'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'
American Idle.
'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'
Check your universal remote control at the door.
'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'
'Breaking Bad' Box Set Addiction.
"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."
'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'
"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"
"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"
"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."
"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."
Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.
"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."
"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."
Starvation Watching
"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."
"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."
"Celebrating Labor Day assumes you've labored at least one day during the previous year."
Birthday To-Do List
Inactive wear store.
'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'
John Stride
"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"
"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."
"Let's see what's going on in the world."
"Shouldn't you be studying?
"You're doing great - keep it up."
'I would've done my homework, but they kept saying 'stay tuned'.'
T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport
'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'
He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.
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