Turntable Wizard Gifts

Happy Birthday Superstar DJ!

"Thank you for letting me listen to my oldies. Let's start with some Jimi Hendrix."

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

"Do you have any knitting patterns for somebody who can only count to five?"

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

A souped up car...

Dung Beetle Pottery Class.

Have our P.R. people do a report on the beneficial effects of cyanide on river life.

Club DJ.

Quick, what's the five-second rule in dog years?

Psychic car mechanics.

'So Roger, how's your invention going?'

Rooster DJ scratches records during party.

"It's a nice invention, but what about GRIDLOCK?"

'Our village cricket club' - Young spinner cleverly positions the field to take a wicket.

'See that? A pile of twigs! That's how you end up if you don't stretch properly before the game.'

Stocktaker counts contents of baked-bean tins.

"A huge breakthrough from our research and development team. . . they've figure out a way to fool all of the people all of the time!"

Useless car accessories.

Doug was right - the woodland animals were attracted to Chopin on a synthesizer.

I love Pottery.

Uses for the wheel (hula hoop).

'The best part is the roadkill!'

"She'll have to call you back. She's on a roll."

'If I have to be at those boring meetings, I might as well get something out of it.'

"My husband said he could fix anything so if you find him, tell him he was wrong"

My Dog Scratch

"After you hear my spin it won't seem nearly as bad!"

"I knew you'd come!"

"Today we'll be exploring basic wheel throwing techniques as well as skimming the surface of our collective male resentment."

NYPD Siren Training

'Little more work needed on your braking Mr Smith!'