Turkey Troublemaker Gifts

'Don't give me that innocent look.'

A young Don King

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

"Oh, I like coming to the dentists. It's the only place where people actually ask me to spit!"

I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not in art class. I will not talk in art class.

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

'Don't look at me!'

'Coulda, woulda, and definitely shoulda.'

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'Well if you're sick of seeing me here, and I'm sick of coming in here,let's call a truce!'

'Ooops. Wonder if I can claim El Nino caused a surge in water pressure?'

'He's the teacher's pet. She keeps him in a cage in the back of the class.'

'Fine, I'll go to my room, but one day when I'm a famous artist you'll be telling this story as an amusing anecdote!'

Whatever 'shenanigans' are, they must be long. Grandma says there's no end to mine!

Christmas was the one time of year when Roger could take advantage of working in the genetic research laboratory.

..And if you unstick my hands from my nose, I promise I won't touch the super glue in my dad's toolbox ever again.

"Blackmail has given me a confidence I've never felt before."

Later that day, little Johnny got in big trouble for playing with them.

'Dear Santa, I want a super plasma intruder. One that blows fire and eats people and destroys citys!!!!! Jimmy. ps Have a merry Christmas!

Children's Self-Help Books. How to Look for a Lost Toy Without Moving a Muscle. It IS Possible to Make a More Annoying Sound! Tying the Impossible Knot. Mom! MOM! Moooooom!

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

'Just think of it as graphic design, Mom.'

Bar: 'Don't bring your troubles in here...we don't want to hear about it!'

Looking for trouble - Can of worms with a can opener next to it.

Playpen Jailbreak.

'I had to get a new imaginary friend. The last one was getting me into too much trouble.'

'Talk about fun, Joey! I dialed a zillion numbers and talked to all kinds of people I couldn't even understand!'

'Don't make me reach back there and turn off that TV.'

The way I see it, when you go around saying "gobble-gobble" all the time, they're bound to get ideas.