Turkey Appreciator Gifts

Thanksgiving and Truthsgiving

"How'd you manage to get so many tickets?"

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

'Stove Top Stuffing! My favourite!'

The great bit pie chart of holiday season dining.

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

"Call me selfish if you want, but I have no issue with spoiling the farmer's Christmas lunch: I'm out of here..."

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"Talk about close calls! Harry, tell them about last Thanksgiving!"

"Never say you're stuffed!"

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

Roscoe's Great Escape

'Haven't you ever heard of warmed up turkey?'

Before and After Holiday Diet

A Dog Is For Life Not Just For Christmas.

'You broke your wishbone. I'd suggest making a wish.'

Turkey Farm Inc: 'And guess what you get for a Christmas bonus?'

"He bought a thermometer for me, and I'm not even sick."

God perfects his turkey design.

Turkey Dinner and gravity

"A reading from the ax of the apostles."

Ineffective Turkey Disguises

'I don't know what happened in there, Stanley... But I've completely lost the urge to eat. I mean it - I feel stuffed! Supposed to come back right before thanksgiving for a follow-up though.'

Holiday Overkill.

'Next year we'll bring the turkey.'

"Hippity hoppity. Easter's on its way."

Christmas escape plan

"Bad news - your DNA was delicious."

And then I said, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." So he said "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." Of course, I had to say, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." It happens every year -0 the turkey never fails to put him to sleep!"

"Since no family can come this year, I thought I'd invite you to dinner instead."

'Want to come to the Thanksgiving play, Grandma? I have a real meaty part.'

'My Christmas bonus.'