Tuition Warrior Gifts

Building has etched in stone above it: 'Education', 'Tradition', 'Financing'

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

Teacher to students: 'A penny for your thoughts, but only if you're here on scholarship.'

'That's required reading' - University Tuition.

"What these students have to understand is that 'higher' education refers to price."

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

"Ted doesn't test well."

Studying and technology

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

Examiners.

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

'Good luck with your exams' (mountain climbers).

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

HOMEWORK: It's a dirty job but somebody's got to do it!!!

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

"That Melinda Alvarez thinks she's so smart! Well, I've been studying, and I'm gonna teach her a lesson on the test we have today!"

'I'll pause for your moans and groans.'

Final Exams Tip

"Buy stock in a college?...I don't think you can...but why would we?"

"You know you're in trouble when you stop praying for the answers and start begging."

Beat me, kick me, make me do story problems.

"'C' isn't EITHER the new 'A'!"

Academia Can Kill By Degrees

Exams

'You have a good chance of recovery, if you can make it through hospital admissions.'

'You might not know it now but I used to have some great lesson plans.'

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Ed."

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

First hurdle to getting a loan. Angry woman.

Good luck with all the revision!!!