Tuition Fee Juggler Gifts

Big Student Loan Debt And Nobody Will Hire Me Because I'm Overqualified.

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

"Everything's gone up."

'You've been pre-approved for another credit card.'

Fries and kids

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

'It's the bank again... What I'd give for a bit of good old-fashioned heavy breathing!'

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'I need affordable daycare now!'

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

Graduating students asking for cash donations.

'If the universe and everything in it is expanding, how come our budget gets shrunk all the time?'

"Beats me how I managed before getting a financial support animal."

'The hospital needs to cut its drug budget...Mrs Miggins will be seeing what she can do for the Oncology department with hot twigs and frogspawn...'

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

'A belt will have to be tightened...not the cars...yours.'

'The salary isn't much, but the expense account to entertain the boss, ohh-la-la!'

'Yes, I think you better had ask Santa for it. Because there's no way I could afford to buy it.'

"Sorry, I'm late. I didn't realize how much credit you had on your card."

'Of course I have unpaid loans, what other kind is there?'

"Sorry, but no. I can't lend you a student to help clean up your yard."

"Buy stock in a college?...I don't think you can...but why would we?"

"Since both of us believe in reincarnation, what if I pay you all the money I owe you in the next life?"

Finance Co., Refinance Co.

"Sometimes I get the crazy feeling that he blames us for the budget overrun."

'I know the marketing budget is stretched...but I still think we need professional models!'