Payment Juggler Gifts

"He only made first four installments."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Look Billington, if you can't take the strain, tell me, ok?"

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

"I managed to find a healthy work-life balance, but now there's a problem with my bank balance."

'You've been pre-approved for another credit card.'

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

Fries and kids

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

'Wait a minute....!

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

'What do I do around here? Sir, I really think I deserve some time for research and preparation before answering that.'

'It's the bank again... What I'd give for a bit of good old-fashioned heavy breathing!'

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

(an employee is in grasp of a giant octopi.The employee's boss is yelling at him through a bull-horn) 'Mr. Smith! According to H.R., you can no longer be employed here! Alright H.R., you can set Mr. Smith down now!'

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

Graduating students asking for cash donations.