Expense Juggler Gifts

'A belt will have to be tightened...not the cars...yours.'

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

'You earned this corner office by cutting corners...'

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

"Look Billington, if you can't take the strain, tell me, ok?"

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

"Everything's gone up."

"I managed to find a healthy work-life balance, but now there's a problem with my bank balance."

'You've been pre-approved for another credit card.'

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

Fries and kids

'The market shifted on me.'

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

'Wait a minute....!

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

'What do I do around here? Sir, I really think I deserve some time for research and preparation before answering that.'

'It's the bank again... What I'd give for a bit of good old-fashioned heavy breathing!'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

(an employee is in grasp of a giant octopi.The employee's boss is yelling at him through a bull-horn) 'Mr. Smith! According to H.R., you can no longer be employed here! Alright H.R., you can set Mr. Smith down now!'

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I need affordable daycare now!'