Trouble Lover Gifts

'You can get into enough trouble just in Geneva - no way you're going to a summit conference in LAS VEGAS!'

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

Remember how you advised me to get a dangerous hobby to build up my self-esteem and impress people? Well, all the dangerous hobbies were already taken. You wrestle alligators

The deadly sport of cobra staring contests.

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

'Don't look at me!'

'Coulda, woulda, and definitely shoulda.'

"He really hates all the fake news!!"

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

Sword Swallow is Bitten by a Mosquito.

'Well if you're sick of seeing me here, and I'm sick of coming in here,let's call a truce!'

"I sensed a fine balance between the misery on the stage and the misery in the audience."

'He needs professional HELP!'

"Come on... you love knocking things off the counter!"

Carmen

'Rain, rain, go away, come again another day'

'Elroy had an unfortunate knack for picking fights with the wrong people'

'He's the teacher's pet. She keeps him in a cage in the back of the class.'

'You're lucky. At least you know your troubles aren't psychosomatic!'

"Have you noticed that the people who want to ban a film are the ones who wouldn't want to see it?"

Monsanto-Research Dept (Genetic Engineering) Publicity Dept (Frenetic Engineering)

"Brad, if you can't say 'I love you' without using finger quotes, I'm outta here."

Whatever 'shenanigans' are, they must be long. Grandma says there's no end to mine!

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Snakeboarding.

'Dad, before I tell you what happened, how much does a piece of glass nine feet by twelve feet cost?'

Greek Tragedy

O'Reilly sez... "It's 'the price of freedom'. Live with it...or not."

Pummping oil on troubled waters.

'Can we wrap up this argument? I've just thought of another one.'

'This is a killer hole!'

Comedy, Tragedy, Facelift