Trivia Titan Pillows

"I'm sorry but the correct answer is not 'I'm sorry if you feel offended.'"

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

Noel Edmonds.

Pub quiz night.

'Things even God could not know - for $400, Alex.'

It's academic

"I'll take 'Remembering things from more than 8 seconds ago' for $200, please."

The Clever Clogs Quiz: Procrastination.

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

"I've outgrown my backpack."

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'

Two Players both holding the same cue.

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"

"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."

'They never let you forget that your intellectual property belongs to them.'

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

Addiction to mobile.

"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"

"Today in school we learned how to text our names."

'Welcome to the rat race.'

"After endless delays, boarding confusion and lost luggage, it appears he's finally arriving at his conclusion."

"Honey,...Oscar wants to go for a walk."

The Academic Brain, showing parts: teach, write, do research, and (the largest part) serve on committees.

Hazard of texting

'If you look closely at the CAT scan, you can see a tiny area of normal brain activity. Otherwise, he's got nothing but a headful of useless sports statistics.'

"And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards."

"Warning! Consumption of alcohol whilst using your phone increases the size of the send button by 90%."

I love my mobile phone.

"If they just added texting to how they calculate GDP, this economy would be growing by 20%."

"Being in education, I'm very athletic — I'm a political football, a punching bag, and a hurdle jumper."

'Hi! So you're the supply teacher? You're the lucky guy we'll be driving up the wall until the real teacher gets back from mat leave!'

'Big tissue?'

Wine Tasting Club