
"I'm sorry but the correct answer is not 'I'm sorry if you feel offended.'"
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"I'm sorry but the correct answer is not 'I'm sorry if you feel offended.'"
Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'
Noel Edmonds.
Pub quiz night.
'Things even God could not know - for $400, Alex.'
It's academic
New Jeapardy! Host
The only thing "odd" about this book is the fact that everything in it seems perfectly natural to me. Odd Facts. ?
"I'll take 'Remembering things from more than 8 seconds ago' for $200, please."
The Clever Clogs Quiz: Procrastination.
"And your Specialist Subject is 'Randomly Shouting Out Guesses to Questions You Know Nothing About'..."
"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"
Annual run-off at the mouth.
"I've outgrown my backpack."
'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'
'The ten commandments have all been reduced to tweets.'
'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'
Two Players both holding the same cue.
"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"
"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."
'They never let you forget that your intellectual property belongs to them.'
'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'
Addiction to mobile.
"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"
"Today in school we learned how to text our names."
'Welcome to the rat race.'
"Honey,...Oscar wants to go for a walk."
"After endless delays, boarding confusion and lost luggage, it appears he's finally arriving at his conclusion."
The Academic Brain, showing parts: teach, write, do research, and (the largest part) serve on committees.
Hazard of texting
'If you look closely at the CAT scan, you can see a tiny area of normal brain activity. Otherwise, he's got nothing but a headful of useless sports statistics.'
I love my mobile phone.
"And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards."
"Warning! Consumption of alcohol whilst using your phone increases the size of the send button by 90%."
"If they just added texting to how they calculate GDP, this economy would be growing by 20%."
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