Trip Planning Gifts

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

happy bellboy carrying suitcases

Italia tours

"Can you get me to the airport in 30 minutes?"

Summer

Desert Island Statues wearing bucket hats.

The sun luring people to the sea

"You want a shuffle flight to Buffalo?"

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Airlines

"First class, or with children?"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"I just..."

'Are we broke yet?'

'Oh, rustic used to mean 'no indoor plumbing', but now it means, 'No computers'!'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"