Trekking Lover Gifts

'Oh crud, how am I gonna get past this guy.'

The experienced backpacker.

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

"They're comfortable."

A tourist inadvertently destroying the place he is visiting

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

Rock Climber

"When troubles begin to take their toll, it’s nice to take a little stroll!"

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

Toivola Jones and the Search For Spring.

"Trail mix?"

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

Sport Utility Boot.

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"Getting the hang of it?"

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

"When are you gonna roll in something?"

Nature Lovers

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

'True it does have small flowers but through the microscope its exquisite.'

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

Bear Signpost.

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

Fork in the trail.

'You're gonna love it son! We'll leave our homes for a few days and live in the great outdoors'

I'm a little disappointed -- I always thought the ultimate secret to the universe would rhyme.

"Nice hopping. Now what?"

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

"No, we’re not lost, Claire. And yes, I have seen ‘Deliverance’!"

"Your bone."

"Free why-fi.”