Traveling Comedians Gifts

'Did you ever consider a backpack?'

Go ahead. Sioux me.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"My guess it's guacamole."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

The leaning tower of Pizza.

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

Biliard Enthusiast

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.