Traveling Comedians Gifts

'Did you ever consider a backpack?'

Go ahead. Sioux me.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Airport Security.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"My guess it's guacamole."

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

Biliard Enthusiast

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.