Travel Comedy Fans Gifts

"Yeah, it's a drag, but the only flight I could get was a red-eye."

Carefree luggage.

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"My guess it's guacamole."

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

Can I have a look at the map?

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

'I'm happy to report our use of air sickness bags has declined sharply since we quit serving meals.'

"I'm going to Bognor next year!"

"Anyone else would have ship wrecked us on a south seas island."

1,000 places to see after you die by Shirley Maclaine.

Holiday Luggage

"The next time you have an 'emergency', have it on the roof like every other self-respecting bird!"

'Hello, this is your captain speaking... I'm on the next flight!'

'I think you'll find you can't tiptoe wearing clogs!'

The Chippendales go through airport security.

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

Business acquaintances on holiday

Traffic Sign

'Next time, spring for a little more, and get a GOOD GPS'

People Holidaying in the Highlands

The Leaning Tower of Pizza

'You've been looking for that cuff-link, haven't you? Well...'

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

'We're not going to Roswell again, it's such a tourist trap.'