Travel Satirists Gifts

Skip the TSA scans by wearing a Burka

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"My guess it's guacamole."

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

Public footpath on a desert island.

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

The leaning tower of Pizza.

Sometimes nature not only calls; she makes an emergency breakthrough.

'Straight on, you can't miss it.'

Biliard Enthusiast

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.