Travel Fashion Critic Gifts

Excess Baggage: You are old enough to remember when folks got all dressed up to travel.

Busy man, busy life, busy shirt.

"This is daring, but I like it."

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

"Underweird bras."

"That shirt is so last year."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

Rogue elephant

Workout clothes: 'One size fits none.'

"Keep heart Rexy boy... even if we strike out, we'll look damn good doing it."

Non-Uniform Day Today.

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

"I hope he's wearing pants."

"You're wearing too much rouge."

On the catwalk it looked elegant and sexy! What happened?

"I see we're split between those who like my new tie, and those who welcome unemployment."

"No, those people aren't anorexic. Those people are starving."

A man with a pocket handkerchief encounters a kangaroo with a pocket handkerchief.

"They put nipples on the mannequins so you'll look at the stupid sweaters. Duh!"

'Hold my purse. I'm going in only to complain.'

'He doesn't seem to like my haircut.'

Columbus discovers ... his feminine side.

The Ravages of Time: Marky Mark, circa 2043

'Sure it looks bad now, but try to imagine it with the right shoes.'

"And then she said, 'You're wearing that to the psychiatrist?'"

"I see he finally got rid of that idiotic comb-over."

'Since you're wearing cargo pants, everything in your pockets is considered cargo and subject to a tariff.'

"Nobody told me it was formal."