Travel Critic Gifts

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

'Memo: Cancel flight.'

"I'm starting to think those rave reviews about this place are rigged."

Poverty in Tourist Attractions

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

Easter Island legs

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Walking Luggage.

Fight or Flight

'Are we there yet?'

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

Long before the GPS, traveling humans found their way around by using an Atlas.

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

The World's Easiest Airport

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

Tourists in Egypt

The only way to see the world is to see the world

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'