Trap Whisperer Gifts

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Police Feline Unit

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"Quick, start the car!"

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"It get it – you're hungry."

"You mustn't pull the cat's tail so hard it tugs the head inside, sweetie!"

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

Dog Dreams

Growl - Hiss Conflict Resolution Meeting

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

'Your shoe's untied.'

Biofelineism

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

'You know too much!'

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

Children's Feast.

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

The Worm Charmer

Cats want answer to the big questions in life.

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

"That is an outrageous slur."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"