Transport Security Gifts

". . . And if you see anything that doesn't look right, contact. . . "

The Anti-Agent

UK border controls relaxed.

High security Santa's grotto

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

"He's a guard dog."

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"I see you've security marked your property."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

The Scanner Of Love.

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

Moulin Rouge Security

"You must be the newly qualified driver."

"Beware of Don"

A Little Extra

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

Death to the Extremists

Scarecrows guarding a field

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

The Best Defense

Mou...Man trap!