Transition To A Desk Job Gifts

"We gave every employee the latest fitness tracker wristband. It helps them keep tabs on our 35-step-per-day limit."

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

Out and In.

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"Does it count it after an 80 hour week he's here in body but his mind is off in La La land?"

Man in office on saddle: 'You heard right. I just got hired as a desk jockey.'

'When will I be old enough to have my own people?'

Working 9 to 5.

'My multi-tasking turned into faulty-tasking.'

Inkwell Genie.

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

'What does L.B.W. mean?'

Whack, Out of Whack.

'Hard day at work, dear?'

'Remember when we used desktop computers? When everyone at least 'looked' busy?'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

'While you were out I replaced you.'

"Welcome aboard - That'll be your work station over there."

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

'Remember, Preston, all work and no play make you employed.'

Boxes marked 'In', 'Out' and 'How did this end up on my desk?'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"I told my manager that I couldn't cope with the endless mind numbing paperwork. I said I'd had enough of the bureaucracy, that I had to get out."

'Being taller than me will get you nowhere.'

"The first of many cubicles..."

'Be a sweetie and get me a cup of coffee!'