Transcendental Philosophers Gifts

Henry David Thoreau

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

Man commiting suicide finds the treasure at the bottom of the sea.

'Funny, I thought a near-death experience would be different, somehow.'

"We found three sort-of Earthlike planets around a nearby star." "Do you think any of them have video games?" "I've been trying to work out the odds of an intelligent species arising and evolving thumbs capable of holding an X-box controller." "Proof of video games would change everything." "I wonder what the aliens on those planets consider sexy." "Living beings creating simulated beings they can smash is the hallmark of an intelligent species."

I've realized something: It's likely that there's only one way for mankind to reach the stars in our lifetimes. Do tell. Scientists believe we'll be able to upload our minds in just 30 years. That means NASA could upload everyone's mind to a robot, and launch it into space. We wouldn't need life support. We wouldn't be affected by radiation or anything. We could even sleep for the 100 years or so it took to get to the nearest star. Then that robot could build more robots and download our minds t

Yeah, I woke up as a roach because I was so full of existential dread – Why did you wake up as a dung beetle?

Quicksands of time

'let's work with what we've got -- take a few of the more promising apes, and add some extra memory.'

"I've got pride but no shame."

Closed Thursdays.

'I hate it when teen angst becomes mid-age angst.'

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

"Here's where all the worries of the world have been seeping into your home."

'I've always found the stars disappointingly small.'

Ralph Waldo Emerson

'If you think God moves in mysterious ways, you should see long division.'

'That be the village sane person,sir!'

"Beetles remain beetles, birds remain birds, dogs remain dogs - why the hell can't we remain caterpillars?"

G7

Elwood P. Farnum: Scientist, Mastermid, Time Traveler.

Europe

"When you have all the answers, what's left?"

'Well, he certainly lived every day as if it was his last.'

"Siri, how do I build a cabin with no freakin' tools?"

'I know that 'you can't take it with you' but what would you do with it when you got there anyway?'

Halo Theft

The Existential Bigfoot

"Remember son, there's no problem so big that it can't be run away from."

"If I was you...I wouldn't be worried about the future..."

"Hey, Robinson Crusoe! Taking the laundry to mommy? Wow, you sure know how to 'rough it'! Haha!!" "Just ignore them." "Can you bring us back some of her blueberry pie? Ha!"

"Somehow, I still feel insignificant."

"I'm afraid there's really very little I can do."

Defeatists Anonymous will meet here tonight at...oh, what's the use? It's not like we're going to solve our problems or anything.