Training Buff Pillows

"I told him he should have trained more."

'Young players have a tendency to forget fundamentals over the winter.'

'This training session is all about challenging assumptions. For example you see someone looking depressed, dishevelled, unkempt it's easy to jump to conclusions. But they may not be a social worker, they may be a client!'

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

"This is where we practice our warning shots."

'This summer, how does obedience camp sound?'

Today's seminar is going to be so much fun...

Muscles

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

"We're exclusively delts."

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

Keep Fit.

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

"It's the cat doc, he scares me."

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

"How much could your mother bench?"

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'The buildings are merging.'

Motivation to Keep Fit.

Pollyanna, the Hamster

'Hey look I got a free newspaper with my wallchart of north sea molluscs aand DVD of elbow stretching excercises.'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"