Tortoise Admirer Gifts

'I'm going to be late. Traffic is at a crawl.'

'He's responding well to the injections'.

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

'Crossing the road is quite easy actually: Just wait until peak hour when the traffic is hardly moving...'

'Thanks for the best birthday gift I ever got...a slow cooker.'

"Time travel will never happen. You'd have to be able to travel faster than the speed of a tortoise for it to be possible."

"Eat my dust!"

"As cats go, my Bertie's always been a little slow on his feet, but then again, that's a tortoise shell for you!"

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

"Good. . . evening. . . welcome . . . to . . . the. . . slow. . . cooker. . ."

Brexit Tortoise

50th Anniversary the Wilderness Act.

Psychiatrist.

Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...

'Sorry, Bill's out of his office today, he should be back Monday.'

'Tortoise stampede! But finish your picnic, folks - plenty of time.'

'Saying I lead a 'sheltered life' is a bit redundant, isn't it, Doc?'

"Hang on Bill, don't draw yet: there seems to be a late entry..."

'I'm sorry, but I just can't handle you being out at sea for so long.'

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

Blind man walking a tortoise.

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

Wonders of Evolution: This species has developed an unusual protective shell.

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'Leo, did you forget to walk the snail?'

"We haven't danced in ages."

The Monitor is going to sleep.

'Quick, I'll give you a piggyback ride home, otherwise, we'll get in trouble for being late...'

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

"I'd love to go out with you. Do I have to have time to change."

'You may disagree with me now, Son, but when you're 500 years old, you'll understand.'