Top Scorer Gifts

GCSE Results.

Football

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

His family thought he'd been wasting his life, but Steve Wiebe was about to prove everyone wrong.

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"Mom: Look what I made!"

"Okay, you got this! Who introduced the theory of punctuated equilibrium?"

"Music helps with maths... like which song got to number one... which song got to number two..."

Kids playing ice hockey for a medal.

'Dubble Dawawg A.K.A. Diplo Matt A.K.A. Spyral A.K.A. Sheldon delman - noted rap artist'

Wilfried Zaha

Goal

Psyche Delia

'Our village cricket club' - An exciting finish to a cricket match.

Game Addiction

"Seeing as you've been so generous giving goals away lately, you're down to play Santa at the Christmas party!"

"I'm so grateful to play for this fantastic club....a childhood dream come true!"

Ski-ball.

Harry Kewell

"I told you my lucky pennies would work."

"Dude, I've never seen you so happy about a 'B' before."

"So you used to be in a darts team?"

'Some day, people will wonder what these goal posts were.'

'He still can't manage to get into the box.'

Where are they now? Paul Henderson.

'Any idea how united got on?'

Negative bar is taped onto bar graph in business meeting.

'No wonder they call him the Cat - he gives the defence kittens!'

"The boring bit about cricket is waiting for them to find the ball after you've hit a six."

Sadio Mane

Footballer's Wages

I don't get it. You can make a goal from one end of the field to the other, but you can't hit the laundry basket six inches away.

Luis Suarez

Things that bands can do

"If only he made goals all of the time instead of just at the beginning of the year."