Sporty Striker Gifts

"If only he made goals all of the time instead of just at the beginning of the year."

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

". . . So that's 4 birdies, 1 eagle, 2 ferrets and a rabbit!"

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

Golf Clubs Underwater.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

The Giamatti era

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"What I miss during school holidays is not going out on strike every Friday."

"It may have been just a kick-about in the garden, but Eric took things very seriously."

Formula One car origami

'It's great that you want a career in football, Timothy, but don't you think being a striker would be more fun than being a goalpost.'

Football Skills

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

Snooker.

Shirts vs Skins: 'I don't know about this.'

'The pro told me my score of 392 is a course record!'

'First time I've seen the club go farther than the ball.'

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

'Torville and Cow'.

Eligible Bachelor: 'Shall I follow you up, Annie; or leave myself for Lizzie?'

"Hold on ! Hold on! When you said you'd played this game before at school...."

Upon winning another bowling championship, Dalton throws his ball to the spectators.

One man's food coma is another man's imaginary game-wining catch.

Athletes doing hurdles, short athlete has vaulting pole.

Chess Trainer

'As I've been told by my union, I went out on strike and I will succeed - I'm a one-man company!'

'He was pretending to be playing for Manchester United when he collapsed with exhaustion.'

UCU University Lecturer's Strike

A road running through a golf course with a sign beside it that reads "Fore!".

Goalie sitting in middle of full park bench waiting for player to shoot

"One more swing and I'm outta here!"