Sporty Strategist Gifts

'That injury weakened your arm. Using this mallet should take car of that problem.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

Eligible Bachelor: 'Shall I follow you up, Annie; or leave myself for Lizzie?'

"One more swing and I'm outta here!"

The Quarterback

"Nonsense! You don't use diathermy for that. You use a whirlpool bath."

"Hold on ! Hold on! When you said you'd played this game before at school...."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

'It sort of makes the game more interesting.'

Chess Trainer

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

Athletes doing hurdles, short athlete has vaulting pole.

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'You had a ninety nine! Bowling, I presume?'

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Perils of the double play.

The Other Cooperstown

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

"I love fast break business success."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'