Tool Belt Trendsetter T-Shirts

The tool belt's great, Jim. Not crazy about the matching tool pumps, though.

'Still having a hard time finding day care?'

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

Award Winning Gardener

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

'Where do I put the batteries?'

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

The Hammer

'I've found a spade I like Julia...'

"The white flag means he gives up and will finally hire a professional to finish the renovation."

"You'll have to excuse my Stuart. He's just showing off his new drill.

'I feel like I'm in a rut, too!'

DIY horror.

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

Handyman Christmas tree with Tools.

'Well, in the hands of my husbnd it's almost as lethal as a loaded gun.'

'My axe is all dull! -- Have you been using it to shave your legs again?'

'Why did you get a huge socket wrench set? You never use socket wrenches.'

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

An Old-Timer/An Old Codger/An Old Geezer

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

...they can't take the factory out of the man - he's off to do some welding.

"Don't disturb Daddy darling: he's just received his new issue of "Basic Tools Monthly"..."

'Yes, Ralph, they are nuts, but...'

"Bob's a tool belt."

'It's an old work injury.'

'Obviously the natives here are sophisticated tool makers.'

"OK, now I want everybody to put their hands together and make something with tools!"

Nervous Kid sees the dentist's toolkit.

Why you should never leave a sander alone in a locked room.