Tongue-out Enthusiast Gifts

Grump Horse and Rider

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

"I want to learn how to talk the talk."

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

Shall I be mother?

"He's a fine talker, but can you understand Portuguese?"

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

"Tongue twisters! These are hard to say! A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk."

'I don't like this part. 'Please find enclosed the inclusion of my enclosure'.'

"I will not tolerate that language in this house. What is it,anyway - Latin?"

"Knowing two languages is sure handy when telemarketers call."

Then laughing aloud, seeming contento, he turned like a flash and was gone el viento.

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

Overly wordy travel.

"Is it ne'er do wells, or ne'ers do well?"

"You don't need to sacrifice good grammar in order to talk dirty."

Simultaneous translation.

Boss hands over document: 'There are too many abbreviations in your report ? can you rewrite it asap?'

Having asked for some 'bruisers' to bruise oats for feeding horses, Mr. Haycock gets sent the 'Whitechaple Chicken' and the 'Bayswater Slasher'

'How come it's always me who has his name taken?'

"I'm home deer!"

"Spell "orange." "The fruit or the colour, Miss?"

'I think it's finally accurate to say that literally everyone is misusing the word 'literally'.'

'She says we never talk. But that's because she doesn't speak English and I don't speak Spanish.'

Back Down

'Assuming, of course, that a woodchuck could chuck wood.'

'We don't seem to be doing well in the foreign beverage market. However, due to a mistranslation of our slogan we've become the leading international provider of embalming fluid.'

"Seriously...girls have their own language!"

"I'm sorry you decided to leave us! I will really miss your wife at our company parties!"

'Watch this - I told him the correct pronunciation of Pinot Noir is peanut noyer.'

"Excuse me. Do you know of anyplace around here that has sea shells for sale?"