Tongue-out-tuesday Fan Gifts

Dog with tongue hanging out window.

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

The Alpha Seltzer

Cat Burglar

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

Wiener Dog . . . Dog Wiener

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"

"If you'd like to take a seat."

"Personally, I'd like to hire you, Mike, but the company has some serious concerns about your core competencies!"

'There is a drug for Hypochondria... but the side-effects may actually make you sick!'

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

Annual Swim Hundreds of Miles, Spawn and Die Marathon.

"There's only the four of us. I hope you like doo-wop."

Surgeon walks through hospital where sign says, 'No Stresspassing'.

"Oh, I'm fine. I just had to take a personal day to recharge my batteries."

"Gimme a lite. Bug Lite."

"Streaming"

Praying mantis.

"Hair spray"

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

Business Promotion.

"I came here to be treated - not flattered!"

"I'm terrible taking tests, too. I always freeze."

S**t Threw a Goose

Gloria, why do you keep saying "Go Fish"? We're playing poker. It's as close as I can get to telling you what I'd really like to in a family newspaper.

'You have a fauxbia.'

'The travel agent says there's nothing available on the port side. Do you want me to see if she's got anything on the sherry side?'

Produce Market. Lots of things are going on with the produce. The tomatoes, as usual, are having a fruit or veggie identity crisis. Though it makes no sense, the apples and oranges are constantly comparing themselves to one another. The plums are happy. Any assignment or position that comes their way is always the best. That potatoes want couches, of course. And the bananas think they should run the market government. Sure, a banana republic!