Tolkien Fans Gifts

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Blind man walking a tortoise.

Mikado

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

Newborn bird sees tortoise and starts wearing shell.

'How's the egg?' '.Turtle crawls out'

Yeah, the commute is killing me too: I live a full kilometre away...

Bird plucking a cello

"Take two aspirin and follow me on TikTok."

"Just be proud we're the first father-son ice dancing team."

God perfects his turkey design.

'But Sweety, you have to learn how to tell the time: As a wolf, you'll often be asked...'

"In my opinion, the best invention was the TV-remote: It used to take me ages to change channel when I had to walk from the couch to the TV..."

'Don't worry. I've got your back.'

'I've thought the same thing myself. He certainly doesn't look like any of us.'

"Has this ever happened to you? Well, with our Medical Emergency Distress System..."

'First, you've got to learn to slow down...'

Lord of the Rungs: Window Cleaner

Tolkien Characters That Never Made it out of the Author's Notebooks

"He believes it will freeze over any day now."

"Don't laugh – it got my uncle out of the Army."

'I always wash it before applying the turtle wax.'

Sauron's Sore Eye

Birds Ice Skating.

'I have no idea how many I have in my flock. Every time I start counting them I fall asleep.'

"Tell him I'm not in."

'Hip!'