Tire Aficionado Gifts

22. Being tireless is good trait to have in most jobs, but not when you're working on a pit crew.

"If you want to work here, you're going to have to dress in business-a-tire."

'There's your leak.'

"Unfortunately, sales have been flat."

"What's a patent?"

He won't sit, but he heels well.

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

Do you suppose this is art or science?

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

"You're right. They do taste funny."

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

Animals are smarter than we think!

"This is my man cave."

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

'Yes, Dear, they are very pretty shoes!'

FASHION NOTESFIRST SHOES FROM ITALY

Caveman on the brink of technology.

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

'You got here just in time - These shoes are killing you.'

'Well great, he's seen it! There goes one more invention they'll get credit for!'

'I can't help thinking there's something else we can do with this.'

Crocodile Shoes

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

"Oh, shut up. Who isn't in your shoes?"

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

'The car dealership is letting me buy an expensive sports car, one piece at a time. I decided to buy the steering wheel first.'

Updated Fairy Tales Cinderella. My lawyers won't let me do glass slippers anymore --- Too many liability issues.

"I just adore these shoes! The clicking of staccato heels is so empowering. . . Do these come in a flat?"

"Yes, a lie. I've been living a lie, I'm not Italian at all."

"Do you have this in an $11.99?"

Does it roll? Does it roll?? You bet Jurassic rolls!