Tire Aficionado T-Shirts

"If you want to work here, you're going to have to dress in business-a-tire."

'There's your leak.'

"Unfortunately, sales have been flat."

"What's a patent?"

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

Maria had always said you could never have too many shoes. Actually, she was wrong.

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

"This is my man cave."

"You're right. They do taste funny."

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

Animals are smarter than we think!

'Honestly Gwen, do you really think that guys are going to notice your heels tonight?'

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

'I can't help thinking there's something else we can do with this.'

Caveman on the brink of technology.

Crocodile Shoes

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

'Well great, he's seen it! There goes one more invention they'll get credit for!'

FASHION NOTESFIRST SHOES FROM ITALY

'Yes, Dear, they are very pretty shoes!'

'You got here just in time - These shoes are killing you.'

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

"Oh, shut up. Who isn't in your shoes?"

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

'The car dealership is letting me buy an expensive sports car, one piece at a time. I decided to buy the steering wheel first.'

"This could mean the end of civilisation as we know it!"

Does it roll? Does it roll?? You bet Jurassic rolls!

"I just adore these shoes! The clicking of staccato heels is so empowering. . . Do these come in a flat?"

"Yes, a lie. I've been living a lie, I'm not Italian at all."

"Do you have this in an $11.99?"

'Quick Betty, come round to the Red Lion and wear your highest heels.'

'It'll make 'feet' obsolete!'

'I just invented the wheel and a new concept called 'growth industry'.'