Tip-master Pillows

If serving staff wrote the fortune cookies.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"See, Og If mammoth foot ticklish, could me do this"

Champagne

"It's touching, actually, to see white dudes fumble around for a few last moments in the spotlight."

"I can't really tell you the future but I'll tell you what's trending on Twitter."

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

Pint

Love wine

Mr Jefferson Brick Proposes a Toast at the 'Rowdy Journal' Offices

'Hello Sir. I'm Jeff, and I'll be kissing your butt all evening in the hope of getting a decent tip.'

"To toast!"

"You're in luck. A slot for you just opened up in our kitchen."

You have no experience eating lobster? Before I spend time showing you how, do you have experience tipping?

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

Pint

'Our fifteenth anniversary -- the adventure continues!'

Our specials today include salad and dessert. Tip and service are NOT included.

Wine Lovers

'I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot.'

"Honey, can you toast some muffins?"

'Thanks, Sis, but I think it's my turn to leave the stealth tip.'

'I told you not to live-tweet this.'

Track runner running out of track

"This one goes out to the lovers who aren’t intimidated by my tip jar."

'Please remember how silly and humiliating grinding pepper is when you figure my tip.'

"It's over between us Brian. . . as soon as I've announced it on twitter."

Printing Room

"Of course I love you . . . didn't you see my Twitter feed?"

'I've had enough of these everlasting arguments - I say you're late!'

Tip Responsibly

"My big fat ego has just discovered Twitter!"

It was … Beep. Unread text notification. It was … Yo, what up? It was the … Reading@tree. It was the … Beep. Facebook update notification. It was the best of … Beep, beep. New tweet. It was the best of times, it was the worst … Beep, beep, beep!!!

Tip responsibly