Tip Tactician Pillows

'Please remember how silly and humiliating grinding pepper is when you figure my tip.'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

"That was a rumor day."

My first mistake.

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

'Hello Sir. I'm Jeff, and I'll be kissing your butt all evening in the hope of getting a decent tip.'

'Doctor, did you say 5 minutes of traction, or 5 hours?'

You have no experience eating lobster? Before I spend time showing you how, do you have experience tipping?

Human males marking territory.

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

Snooker.

'Remember, shares can also go down...'

'Oi, do you mind, trying to speak to my colleague - two self service tills having a chat together.'

"It has come to my attention that there's a traitor in our midst."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

'Sir, our sales force has just taken Atlanta.'

I've left your pin on the map, but I've loosened it.

'Queen you? There's no queen in checkers, and never has been or will be.'

'I don't know about you, Sam, but so far my clients aren't going for this cross between tradtional and online trading.'

"This one goes out to the lovers who aren’t intimidated by my tip jar."

'I wonder who they'll bring on as manager for the second half.'

"Isn't it about time you tidied up around here...?"

'Better get used to player rotation!'

"You didn't let me win; I let you lose."